Edward T. Mechmann, Esq., Coordinator
212.371.1011 x3187  edward.mechmann@archny.org
 

 

We would like to offer you information and links regarding these hot topics. If you have questions about the Catholic perspective on these or any other subject, the best place to start is a search through the Catechism of the Catholic Church.

Also, the National Catholic Bioethics Center has made several resources available through their website www.ncbcenter.org

 

Defending Marriage

The institution of marriage is under severe attack both in our nation and abroad.  There is a growing social acceptance of non-marital unions (cohabiting couples, "domestic partners", same-sex "marriages"), and they are being given the same legal status as marriage.  This will undermine the privileged place of marriage as the foundation of society.  It will also inevitably lead to greater social instability and will harm both adults and children.

For more information about these threats to the family, check out the statement by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, and other information on their website, including their recent statement "Between Man and Woman".  You should also visit the website of the Religious Coalition for Marriage, which is sponsoring a petition in support of the Marriage Protection Amendment;  a number of Catholic prelates have already signed the petition, including Cardinal Egan.  It would also be worthwhile to review the theological foundations for this issue, which are set out in the document from the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, "Family, Marriage and De Facto Unions"

For information about recent threats to the family here in New York, please click here.

See below for more information about cohabitation.

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End of Life Issues

In the aftermath of the tragic Terri Schiavo case, there has been a great deal of attention paid to end of life issues, including “living wills” and "extraordinary treatment".  It is very important that we clearly understand the basic issues involved in this area, as well as the relevant teachings of the Church.

Moral Principles

Decisions regarding the medical care of gravely ill person have great moral significance. They require us to face the reality of suffering and death, in the light of faith, confident in the redemptive power of our suffering united to the Cross of Christ, with the sure hope of the resurrection.

No matter how grave a patient's ailment or incapacity, they always remain a person, made in the image and likeness of God, and precious in his sight. It is always wrong to deliberately cause the death of an innocent person, either by our direct actions or by failing to perform a duty.

The fundamental distinction that should be borne in mind is whether medical treatment is "ordinary", which is morally obligatory, or "extraordinary", which is morally optional and can be declined.

What are “extraordinary” treatments? According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, they are “medical procedures that are excessively burdensome, dangerous, or disproportionate to the expected outcome”. If you decline such treatments, you are not causing death. Instead, you are refusing "over-zealous" treatment and acknowledging the inevitability of death. (Catechism, no. 2278)

Even if death is imminent, we must always provide the ordinary care owed to a sick person -- nutrition, hydration, cleanliness, warmth, etc. Death from an underlying cause, such as cancer, must at some point be accepted, but a person should never die from starvation or dehydration.

On this subject, Pope John Paul II has said, “I should like particularly to underline how the administration of water and food, even when provided by artificial means, always represents a natural means of preserving life, not a medical act. Its use, furthermore, should be considered, in principle, ordinary and proportionate, and as such morally obligatory…”  

In 2007, the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith said "The administration of food and water even by artificial means is, in principle, an ordinary and proportionate means of preserving life. It is therefore obligatory to the extent to which, and for as long as, it is shown to accomplish its proper finality, which is the hydration and nourishment of the patient. In this way suffering and death by starvation and dehydration are prevented."  (See also the Congregation's Commentary on this declaration for a fuller discussion of nutrition and hydration, particularly in the case of persons in a so-called "vegetative state")

Ordinary care would also include providing a sick person with painkillers, even at the risk of shortening their life. In this case, death is not willed as either an end or a means. (Catechism 2279)

“Living Wills”

Much is heard about “living wills” -- a specific instruction on a particular course of medical treatment, usually with regard to life-sustaining treatment. They are also known as “advance directives”.

There are many problems with “living wills”. They are inflexible, and tie the hands of your doctors and loved ones. Because it's impossible to foresee your exact medical situation, they are inherently vague and can be confusing to doctors. Most “living will” forms that are generally available are actually “refuse treatment” forms that create a presumption in favor of death.

For these reasons, we strongly recommend that you avoid a so-called "living will". Instead, we recommend that you appoint a Health Care Proxy.

Health Care Proxies

Under New York State law, a Health Care Proxy allows you to choose someone you trust to make medical decisions for you, if you can’t do it for yourself. It only takes effect if you are incapacitated and it lapses if you recover.

You should choose someone as your Proxy whom you trust to act in your best interests, according to your moral values. You should give your Proxy specific instructions about your Catholic values, especially about assisted nutrition and hydration. You do not need a lawyer to appoint a Health Care Proxy – all you need is to have two witnesses to your signature.

A sample Health Care Proxy form, with instructions, is available here.  A Spanish version is available here. For more information, contact us or download this information sheet.

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Homosexuality

We are all God’s children. And for those people with same sex attraction, God has great mercy and love. For many, it is a cross in which they and their families carry with deep sorrow and ambivalence. As Christians, we must seek and uphold God’s truth, with love, for ourselves and others, often in spite of the difficulty it brings.

By practicing the virtue of chastity, persons with same sex attraction have an opportunity to find abundant graces in making Christ first in their hearts. The universal call to holiness involves chastity according to our state in life. In general, chastity means the wholesome integration of sexuality within a person’s physical and spiritual being. But only when it is lived out in the complete and lifelong gift of self between a man and woman, does sexuality, involving one’s body and its biological functions, become personal and truly human. The virtue of chastity for married people encompasses the integrity of the person in a total self-giving of themselves to their spouse.

In this age, this issue is particularly challenging. Chastity is misunderstood and ignored by numbers of Christians, including single, engaged and married people. (see below for information about cohabitation and contraception) Since many are not practicing the virtue of chastity, their reverence for it and their acknowledgement of violating it is greatly diminished. But, the dire consequences of separating sex and the sacrament of marriage and an openness to life nevertheless remain and do great damage to families and society. For all of us, sins against chastity are serious offenses against God.

We are informed by tradition and sacred scripture that homosexual acts are at odds with the dignity and integrity of the person, created in the likeness and image of God, made male and female. Such acts “ … are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from the genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.” (CC 2357)

These may sound like harsh and uncompromising words. The personal experience of affection that one person feels for another in a homosexual relationship may in some aspects image authentic love.  But ultimately this relationship is a only a counterfeit -- it can never embody the true fullness of the authentic chaste love between a man and woman in the Sacrament of Marriage.

But there is great hope for those who struggle with same sex attraction. The organization, Courage, an apostolate of the Roman Catholic Church, ministers to those with same-sex attractions and their loved ones. They have been endorsed by the Pontifical Council for the Family. From their website you will learn about homosexuality and how by developing an interior life of chastity, the universal call to all Christians, one can move beyond the confines of the homosexual identity to a more complete one in Christ.

For more information, check out this document from the Vatican about the pastoral concern of the Church for homosexual persons.

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Pornography

Contrary to what many believe, pornography is not harmless.  Many people, along with their families and children, are seriously harmed by the twisted messages that are contained in sexually explicit pictures, books, magazines, movies and websites.  Pornographic images and writings distort the beautiful gift of sexuality by separating its expression from the covenant of marriage.  Pornography also teach us to treat ourselves and others as mere objects to use for sexual pleasure -- which is the very opposite of authentic human love.  The use of pornography gives support and money to a corrupt and profoundly unjust industry that is founded on the degradation and exploitation of men, women and children.  There are many victims of pornography.

For many people, both men and women, pornography is not just a question of a bad habit -- they have become burdened with a virtual addiction to pornography and compulsive sexual behavior, particularly due to the Internet.

The good news is that there is help available for those who are attracted to pornography or who have sexual addictions.  If someone you love has this problem, we would recommend one of these books and websites:

When Good Men Are Tempted, by Bill Perkins (an excellent overall treatment of the problem, although some of his advice is not in keeping with Catholic beliefs on moral issues)
Out of the Shadows, by Patrick Carnes (excellent review of sexual addictions, including Internet problems)

CatholicTherapists.com -- a website that offers referrals to counselors who are committed to the teachings of the Church
Sexaholics Anonymous -- this nation-wide organization conducts support groups (12-Step type programs) in the NYC area
www.porn-free.org -- a website full of good info on porn addictions, with an emphasis on spiritual strategies for healing
Esther Ministries --  an Internet ministry that offers help for wives whose husbands have the problem.

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Cohabitation

Conventional wisdom tells young couples that living together before marriage is a good idea -- a way to test the relationship and to determine if you're really ready for marriage.

As with so many other popular myths, this one is absolutely wrong. Studies show very clearly that living together does not “work”. The divorce rate for couples who have lived together is much higher than for other couples (some studies report a 50% higher divorce rate); in the case of men who have lived with a series of women, the divorce rate is even higher; and the longer the couple lives together, the higher is the divorce rate.  The conditional and temporary nature of the cohabitation arrangement typically leaves the couple with communication and conflict resolution problems, and often leads them to lack trust in each other.  They also frequently have serious reservations about entering into the permanent bond of marriage.  In reality, living together before marriage is not a good idea for a strong relationship.

The problem with cohabitation goes much deeper than these pragmatic concerns.  The gift of sexuality has profound meaning, written into our very nature by God.  Our sexuality is intended by God to lead us to the life-long bond of marriage, in which we give ourselves to our spouse freely, fully, fruitfully, faithfully, and forever.  When spouses make love, they proclaim this covenant with their bodies.  Living together before marriage, and the sexual activity that goes along with it, fails to fulfill this beautiful purpose and meaning of our sexuality.  It is not the full and unconditional giving of oneself for life, since by its very nature it is conditional and temporary. 

In effect, living together is a mirage.  It resembles the real thing -- marriage -- but it leads us astray and deprives us of the true and full gift of self God wants for us.   As a result, living together before marriage -- and any sexual activity outside of marriage -- undermines our ability to love one another and gravely wounds our relationship with God.

What should you do if you’re living together before marriage? You should speak honestly and openly to your priest about the situation, and either separate or agree to be chaste until marriage.  Also, go to Confession, and seek God’s forgiveness and healing.  You should also take a serious look at your motivations and expectations about your relationship, and ask yourselves if you are truly ready to enter into a life-long marriage.

For more information, see this interview with a nationally-respected expert on successful marriages.  Also, please check out the statement by the Bishops of Pennsylvania, on "Living Together", and the report "Should We Live Together?", published by the National Marriage Project of Rutgers University.

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